Um, I don't know who U MEANT to send that to, but yes I WAS going to fuck you. Instead you can go play Halo with ur friends.
Dude, she had a vegina. I felt like Indiana Jones cutting a path through the jungle.
New. Vanessa hudgens nude pics
That text made me feel like i signed up for some awesome celeb nude pic reminder
Also, on a completely related note, just came up with an awesome business plan. You in?
winter break is going to suck... i have to put away my college personality and transform into who my parents think i am.
yeah after seeing those pics of her puking into my underwear drawer i remembered again why i didn't want to invite her.
you didn't check your sock drawer yet did you
She's dressed as Musafa. How could this not be a good idea?
All the walks of shame were condensed into the hour before parents started showing up. Move out day is so bittersweet
we tried to steer you away from them but you just kept yelling 'i need dick' and going back. sorry.
Does anyone know who that girl who fell backwards and broke the shoe rack with her head was?
Some guy seriously just got Jimmy Johns delivered to him at the graduation ceremony. This cannot be real life.
he came during what was supposed to be the foreplay blowjob. there goes my evening.
You woke us up at 9:15 am still in your toga from last night saying "welcome to my house party...party". You had already filled up the pong cups with yaager/fireball and ordered a chicken platter... Who even delivered that that early???
There's a guy running dressed as a bunny toward your house.
I have 2 phone numbers written on my vagina. I told you I shouldnt be left to my own devices after tequila shots.
I'll seduce him with my charm, after all, I am a graceful swan.
More like a demented cow.
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