Yes, it's true. 4 fingers.
he's going on about how he's going to treat me right and wants to let himself be in love with me and spend a lot of time together. kids these days. like its not about sex anymore. i'm confused.
The pickup line "You look exactly like my sister" would only work in Arkansas...SCORE!!
maybe tonight we can turn coloring into a drinking game
does wine, beer, and vodka mix well??
dude, everything can mix, this is college.
It could have went better. They kicked us out of the casino and I drunkenly whipped her across the face with a fishing pole. Long story.
My cab driver has a hooker in the front seat. Really, this is serious. And weird.
I miss her, but also fucked her ex boyfriend.... So there's that
Yeah you burned that bridge with your vagina
I'm highly inebriated watching star wars, this text was sent via the force
I feel worse lying to the guy I hooked up with than I actually do for cheating on my bf
I knew it was all downhill from there when the straight vodka I was drinking tasted like water.
I mean, I let him sleep with me after we both ate taco bell sober... That's kinda like love, right?
You know those times when you're sitting down for a while and r like damn I'm sober but then stand up and r like WOAH HOLD UP.
so it turns out that when you ride the subway drunk at 5 am you wake up with a sailor in your bed
Who the hell tries to steal eggnog.
Randomize
