Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(850): View more from Florida

We all just poured out a sip of our drinks for you. One for our pussy whipped homie.

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(719): View more from Colorado

I woke up with ten beers in my bag that hoarded at the party last night. Rally? Its five somewhere.

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(714): View more from California

i just opened the overnight bag i packed at 2am last night. Apparently all i thought id need was a handful of quarters, mascara and one sock

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(301): View more from Maryland

He left with a pair of dress shoes, some goggles, and a shot glass. I think we should follow him.

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(805): View more from California

The plan is to make enough mistakes this weekend to hold me over until spring break

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(828): View more from North Carolina

Is waterboarding an exceptable way of getting sober?

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(770): View more from Georgia

Dude that bathroom stall was not tall enough to be doing lines in, guys kept peeking over and giving us high fives

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(814): View more from Pennsylvania

Right now, I'm sitting in my room, drinking beer, eating double stuff Oreos, taking bites straight from a block of cheese, and watching Anchor Man 2 trailers. Finals week at its finest

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(612): View more from Minnesota

he was Irish, I had to have sex with him.

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