he had two deer mounted on his dorm room wall with panties and bras hanging from the antlers... i cant believe i contributed to bambi's headgear...
I just got over my period in 3 days...I believe that is god's way of saying "go fuck an amazingly attractive Italian boy on vacation"
Some drunk couple just made out on the sidewalk and it reminded me some sweet moments we have shared...
I'm going to knit you a pair of furry handcuffs. And you said that knitting class was dumb.
I think there was chlamydia in those woods.
My building was evacuated who wants to quake and bake
I just sprawled out on my bedroom floor and cried while shoveling chocolate into my mouth.. I should not have Bacardi at home
I don't know if trying Molly for the first time before my flight was an awesome or aweful idea
Thanks for bringing that stuff to help me feel better...you know, the water, the Gatorade, and the dick. You really are the best friend ever.
Dude, we got to the strip club as they were closing, and you starting crying because, and I quote, "This is the closest to birthday sex I'm gonna get."
this weekend took five years off my life and what was left of my dignity
Yeah but him not going to be sleeping in your sink this time.
Honestly I volunteered because the email made it sound like it was a once in a lifetime opportunity to be a sexual spy kid.
congrats on being the token straight people in our group.
I don’t know what language he speaks but I know my boobs will translate just fine
I’m looking forward to few days of international relations
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