I dont kno what was worse. Waking up 2 a guy next to me thinking I got blackout or realizing it was your boyfriend.
I just wish we had the ability to download food from our TVs.
He ran headfirst into the atm. Thenasmed us what our spirit animals were...he said his was either a dolphin or a cabbage
There are apples in the microwave and a cup of twigs in the fridge. I think she's hiding in the pantry, I can hear her giggling. Leaving her to it.
i also took my stockings off in the bathroom and blew my nose with them in the cab ride home. james was appalled
I think we should have realized the night was going to be nuts when it started with a bum dying in front of my house.
Also I feel that I would be a hell of a sled dog operator.
My logic for bringing him home was, he's in law school so odds are he wouldn't kill me.
do you think me going to the gyno dressed as a cat is inappropriate?
My sweat smells like Wild Turkey. I'm really feeling the holiday spirit.
It's only just- an eye for an eye, a tooth for a tooth, a nude for a nude
Not sure, she said after cussing out the dentist they called security. Make that the first person I know 86'ed by a dentist.
my mom just came into my room and handed me a news paper article about women on the verge of a drinking problem... i can already tell its not about to be sunday funday
you were screaming "I don't need a shirt!" repeatedly while in the process of taking it off and flashing the bouncer. we got kicked out. thanks a lot.
My new gym is popular with trophy wives. They’re talking about yachts and plastic surgery
Learn their secrets! I want to meet men with Maseratis. The meat heads and Mustangs scene is getting old
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