Your parents are going to be so confused in the morning
More like pissed. but ill be sure to explain my pathological fear of terrorists hiding in the bathtub
I wish i could be there for it
You said you wanted to go to louisiana and get arrested by Steven segal
I was high enough to understand and function with 'flip' while playing brick breaker
Damn. I don't think I could ever be that high.
All I remember is saying that "fire will make it all better"
just had to shower sitting down. i hope this isn't an indicator of how the rest of my week is going to go.
he busted in while i was showering looked at me and said "youve lost weight bro, no homo" and started puking into the sink
I'm at the point in my life where I'm trying to get guys I've fucked to give a ride to guys I'm going to fuck.
My bullwhip has saved my life tonight and gotten me laid. I'm gonna be Indiana Jones every Halloween!
which guy lost his keys in my bed this weekend?
Just remember that I named his dick Robo-cock before he got into the sheriff's department.
I would eat the Denny's grand slam special out of my new probation officers b hole
I'm glad our friendship can withstand laughing mid-blowjob during the diarrhea scene in Dumb & Dumber.
After an hour of searching for my pants, we had three people looking. They were finally found in the oven.
If I could drink as much and have the amount of sex he has at his age, well I'd probably be dead
Dick very happy bro
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