3:26am: come over
you purposely dodge me and you could have stopped me from leaving, you know how far i live. YOU come over
4:11am: mnlodp
dude I don't understand hebrew and I'm not coming over
I just want you to know that me val and amanda are drinking on top of a hill lookig at the chicago skyline drinking icehouse and we just peed in public.
he suggested i make a website called "cum on molly's face", to "start off my acting career"
i would totally change schools right now just to be that new girl everyone wants
Sunburnt clitoris. How do I deal with it.
..She then engaged in what she called an "interpretive pole dance"
he was holding the bottle like a running back yelling for security and the national guard as he was being tackled
In the UK. Bar special, every drink costs a pound. I'm two shots away from being deported. God save the queen.
I'm currently eating a turkey dinner, listening to xplosive by dr. Dre, and drinking rum. Hispanic christmas dinners are the best.
I woke up naked under desk at her apt once during my freshman year. I should have known that friendship was of a different breed...
He threw a twenty at the stripper and asked for change
well did he get it
....yes
You're right. I woke up today with my ugly sweater still on and no pants. I'd say it was a successful night.
Smoking a bowl and ordering Dominos, you want in on either, both, or none?
What the fuck were you guys talking about?
Lube wrestling.
Oh, makes sense.
My lack of taco bell is hindering me from seeing the good part of that situation
Randomize
