she lunged for my junk like it was the cure for swine flu
Whore.
I was being facetious
Don't try to hide behind big words.
if you don't start talking to me i'm gonna tell your gf that you said she tastes bad
My pussy is not your playground.
Still drunk just puked in the meat cooler tried to clean it up with ham. Its not working
i was so fucked up i thought i was at home depot
I'm doing it for my vagina. You should understand that
Unlimited sex for unlimited netflix. I can deal with that. I think this is the first prostitution deal for netflix ever.
And after that you guys started calling arbor mist "breakfast juice"
If I drank a glass of water for every drink I had I'd die of water intoxication like some tweaked out looser at a rave
The only excuse this guy at the club had for trying to make out with me as soon as I met him was "I AM FROM MEXICOOO"
I WAS CONCIEVED IN THE BACK OF MY CAR. THATS HOW OLD THIS CAR IS.
...how and why.
PARENTS ARE MAGIC.
I was so ripped I had a natty light box over my head carrying a spray bottle out in the streets trying to give car washes.
She said my mask was creepy, took it off with her teeth, and proceeded to bite my neck. I love vampires.
ready for a night of bad decisions, horrible moral standards, and an unhealthy amount of illegal substances.
Randomize
