From the crime scene it appears that I attempted to throw up into a candle.
you kept trying to convince me i had aids because my head hurt
well. it's seven AM and i'm too high to hula hoop.
pretty sure i had my hand down BOTH their pants at the same time at some point...
stumble upon led me to how to make wine in prison, followed by wedding dresses. it knows my life too well
I have no recollection of sleep choking you
At IHOP. It feels weird and sad that your cleavage isn't here for me to try to toss paper wads into.
It's been two whole weeks and I haven't missed a single class. I deserve 69 blunts.
That said I did get head on the roof of a 15 story building which, regardless of quality, is still cool
I'm kinda sad I'm leaving the bank. I never got to have rough sex in the vault.
There were firefighters and a fire truck up the street. I asked what was wrong and their exact words were "Just a tiny explosion; it'll be all right"
You've got the chocolate, drugs and my pants. You hold all the cards...
Whatever you wanna call it i just wanna get railed tonight
So, I almost went hone with a French guy and a drag queen. Together. Then I became sober enough to realize, that's not my style.
21st birthday weekend in Vegas has concluded and all I'm missing is my underwear and 'Contacts' icon on my phone home screen.
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