Sitting in class thinking wow im glad im not hungover...and then i realized im still drunk.
GOOD IDEA: Stealing the bike a couple blocks away so I don't have to walk. BAD IDEA: riding bike for the first time in years drunk as hell. I'm bleeding and my body hurts and once again I can't find my car.
just got double teamed by two guys I will be on beach patrol with this summer. six months until the season starts and I'm already 'that girl.'
I've started grabbing my boobs in front of my lesbian philosophy professor so she'll give me a better grade. It's working...
I was trying to be an adult about it and simply deal with the situation, but a bowl seemed much more comforting.
and then i signed some dudes back with a turkey hand print in honor of thanksgiving
He was having Sex and you yelled 'hot and dangerous!" and he responded with "if you're one of us then roll with us!" when he went to he bathroom I saw her getting dressed, looking mortified.
I really care about you, but im still gonna have to make you pay for dinner from the pain and suffering in my knees and vagina.
Definitely broke my toe and messed up my knee walking back. Drink hitch hiking should never happen again.
I'm gonna go ahead and say I love our drinking habits but anytime we roundhouse a 750 of Schnapps on the way to a non competitive bowling league we might have problems
Well I just found a coupon for cheese in the bathroom so I've got that going for me
Rage-masturbating and then crying myself to sleep. Welcome to Wednesday.
I would say don't do anything I wouldn't do, but we both know I forget about my personal safely when getting laid is on the line
I woke up cuddling a ham. That's not a euphemism. I actually slept with an entire ham.
Our sex sesh was interrupted by a bunch of hobos fighting outside his apartment.
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