JoAnns office is warmer than mine. . .it must be because she has the gateway to hell under her desk.
Y'know, without the cops, it would've just been us daydrinking,
Well he's not a stripper, so we're already doing better than my last date.
I think he's in need of mouth to penis resuscitation. Which I happen to be certified
you should be careful. everyone knows your chances of pregnancy increase by 100 percent when youre the daughter of a religious figure
im just laying here pukin in my mouth and swallowing it 'cause im WAY too lazy to actually get up and find a place to vomit. this is my life now.
So I'm thinking next semester you should be my own personal maid, nurse, masseuse and chef in exchange for free lodging, any food you can find, and unlimited access to my reproductive organs.
If I had a dollar for every straight boy that questioned their sexuality because of me, I would live a comfortable middle-class life.
At least they play good movies in the waiting room of the pregnancy resource center.
We shared a dick. We're practically sisters!
YOU SHOULD HAVE BEEN THE FIRST VISITOR TO CHRISTMASLAND
His penis is the only thing worth pursuing but all the baggage attached isn't.
So... Sorry we took your wife to the strip club last night... And sorry we bought her that lap dance... I think you're getting closer to your dream of a threesome, though.
I just made deviled eggs for everyone not passed out. Im officially becoming a drunk chef.
he said he only had one rule...that he'd only go down on me 3x a day. so far this is turning into the best relationship ever.
Randomize
