i just dont know how to see an unattractive person as more than a friend
either i blacked out mid-sex but remember the beginning and end, or he really only lasted a couple of minutes
besides im still about 80% sure that im eskimo brothers with jerry springer
Are you seriously trying to guilt me into sending you naked pictures by saying "So I can look at them during dialysis" ?
Is it working?
We call it lazy sex. We just lay next to each other and help each other masturbate. that way we can both be on bottom.
the bartender cut you off himself after you started walking on tops of tables and hugging random people
I still can't believe you had sex with someone who willingly went by Peaches.
Please explain why there is a video of you peeing in the Taco Bell bathroom on my phone? Also why did you wink at the end?
He wanted to have sex in a church because he has keys to it from court-ordered community service. WHAT IS STANDARDS?
So I pull up to an apartment complex and immediately felt like I was here to get stoned.
Don't do shots out of Tostitos scoops.
I'm sad about how hungover I'm gonna feel tomorrow.
The magnum condom fits. I feel like a manly version of cinderella
Pornhub is actually a very wholesome website
This year my vagina is giving thanks that several of my cubs are coming home for the holiday
Randomize
