I don't understand why some guys want to have a huge conversation while standing at the urinal with cock in hand...
Definitely just saw the guy I went on a date with Friday night dressed in medeival knight gear on the quad preparing for battle. Oh my God.
The problem is he wears abercrombie jeans like there's nothing wrong with it
i just carried on a conversation with my mother from another room mid-ejaculation. you would have done the same
in the practice room. just found 3 bottles of smirnoff hidden inside the piano. SO glad i didn't get into berklee...
Hes flirting with her via the sauce packets at taco bell....... I have no words
I can't figure out how to get this beer bong in my carry on without airport security questioning me as it goes through the x-ray.
I wish there were birth control emojis
I CAN'T FUCK HIM OUTSIDE. THAT'S FOR PEASANTS. HE'S TOO FAMOUS FOR THAT.
So while you were living in this woman's apartment, you acquired a room mate, fucked her daughter, and killed her bunny. Worst sitter ever
I had wine for breakfast at 6am, that's how visiting my parents went.
You stopped making out with some rando guy to tell him you weren't sure about your sexuality then proceeded to follow me down the street to make out with me
We had sex and then stood naked in his living room eating zucchini bread.
did you just try to prove your straightness by quoting a lady gaga song?
I want to ride that like one of the Horsemen of the Apocalypse- with bourbon in hand and without mercy.
Randomize
