I gotta feeling the economic climate has killed the housewife market
Do you know of any times in scooby doo when the monster turned out to be a real monster? You know not just a person?
It's gonna be pretty hard to find a homeless person that takes crackers as currency.
The bridesmaid just threw up on herself. This is going to be the best wedding ever
we've decided to start cutting you off when you can't figure out how to work an ipod.
I want to bury your face in my vagina. Possibly by force. I will try not to suffocate you though.
Well... this vagina won't eat itself
I just puked in my non fat yogurt... But it's non fat in hopes that someone wants to eat my vagina
You should have hard cock pics on hand to send in the situation that you can't stop driving, pull out your cock, browse the countless pics I've sent you of my tits, get him hard and text a pic through. I mean, it's simple sexting ettiquette.
I broke out the Krispy Kreme, and am possibly having random internet sex in less than an hour. I think I got this breakup under control.
We watched scrubs, then I got a shower blowjob which led to shower sex and the living room floor sex. Now she's baking cookies. I may not be studying, but I'm doing something right.
On way back. With a shopping cart. Minimal casualties.
Apparently drinking in your car before going into a sales meeting is frowned upon. We are car sales men not doctors.
You kept saying "this bitch", mumbled incoherently for like 5 minutes, took a shot, and kept going.
he's fucking insane. he's worse than me. is that even possible? I'm only with him because his dick is huge. I need Jesus.
Two words: nipple clamps
Randomize
