He's so far in the closet he's in Narnia
He's on drugs...like drugs for horses.
On my way, I hope you have alcohol for me to blame stuff on...
This boy just came into class wearing sperrys and a polo but also carrying a longboard. I'm unequivocably attracted to his level of doucheyness.
Just try to make good decisions...remember our convo we had about morals the other day?
Turn them off?
SO stoned. Sitting in just a thong in front of a fan. NO work for a WEEK! Life is good :)
Is it sad that when she told me he has a small peen I felt like it made us more compatible?
i'm not the one sitting naked in my room playing with my boobs and a cat.
I changed the background on my phone to a picture of you so whenever I go to look at porn or text another girl I'll have second thoughts
Am I supposed to find that romantic?
Jason and steven are boiling shrimp in the microwave again
We defiantly won best dressed in the ER tonight
He was drinking wine out of a pyrex measuring cup at two in the afternoon and told me my ass looked fantastic in my sweatpants. I love university
Zak is like the Picasso of masterbatory texts
I stopped his blowjob to raise 3 fingers & whistle the hunger games tune to the people walking past the window
Is she still on a quest to lick every stranger that enters the bar, or have the restraining orders reached critical mass?
Randomize
