I changed my tire completely alone.. I could totally win survivor
Its my greatest physical accomplishment
Now that I'm 21, I feel like I'm letting North Dakota down by not being drunk everyday
My grandma put hard boiled eggs on her lasagna. I'm not high enough for this.
you're letting him buy you a plane ticket...to kentucky...so you can fuck him?
i know. i'm only adding to the interstate sex trade problem.
i just got cum up my nose. i would have expected more from the captain of the men's lacrosse team
She kept chasing him yelling thief, because he drank some of her drink. That was at 8, it got worse.
Theres a high probability there will be two hot men waiting on you in your bed when you get home for lunch.
He came over drunk in a speedo i told him he has my vote he said who are you voting for when i said obama he took off running and shouting i was worthless like an empty beer can
I was angry that a college kid had a new Audi
so I peed on it
I want Walter White to make me a bologna sandwich while I'm chained to a support
I'm getting high with a 50 year old car wash guy. Enough said.
Today one of my patients offered me pot brownies. Medical school worth it. Living the dream.
what food is Colorado known for?
Pot brownies.
I'm really interested in the size of his penis so report back on that one
An old Grimace plushie came to life and gave me a pretty knife. I'm never doing acid again.
Randomize
