yeah, i liked him til i heard he had a sac that could apparently smother my face.
Whenever ur ready we need breakfast and a psychic.
the last thing i remember is fucking her. GAME CHANGER i woke up in another bedroom to her younger sister blowing me
Dude, you face planted, there was no "bar fight".
yeah, but the first step is admitting you have a problem, the next step is kidnapping him
I remember just enough about last night to wish I didn't remember anything.
Don't worry I'm alive. The apt is all locked up so I'm sleeping on the patio. The frozen pizza I got might be toast unless someone lets me in soon. If not its all good I'll be here snoring on the patio
Donald Trump and I would be so adorably orange together!
Liar. My heart is broken and my boobs are disappointed.
Adulthood is making your own puke bucket.
I'm drinking apple juice and champagne while watching crossroads..like the classy bitch that i am.
Its just akward. Everytime he tells me he loves me, I have to respond with, I love having sex with you. and he just stares at me in amazement
Dude I'm drinking alone and watching cartoons. How is it that someone as hot as me is doing this.
This is the Front Desk Lady from the Saturolite Inn. Your friend is passed out in the lobby. Please come help her.
How was the tequila? Are you making bad decisions yet?
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