When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
hey can i ask you a kinda weird question?
i know what the question is. yes they are bigger, and no i did not get plastic surgery
zippers are such a cool invention
relax...and go to your happy place, which probably has a lot of dicks
No one even knew you were hurt until we saw the multiple cuts to prove it, and when we asked what happened all you could say was "I fell out"
she made out with a stripper. how was scrabble night with your girlfriend
Just woke up to the best idea ever. Vodka infused BUTTER. Take a second, and think of the possibilities.
he stopped during sex, told me i smelled like McDonald's and went harder..
Fun new game when high: sorting socks. Took forever. Was awesome.
For our final psych experiment, we're conditioning Tim to hump the nearest inanimate object and/or person every time he hears a Ke$ha song
Just sent my cousin to buy me a new bra cause mine is zip tied to a bar in the middle of nowhere Iowa
I can't wait for you to tell me about your sex.
It's a short, short story.
Vodka and Jamison is not a mixed drink
why did i wake up in the bathroom?
we had to stay with you a while until we convinced you it wasn't safe to wash your face, then you fell asleep with your foot in the toilet.
Fuck you. All I remember from last night is telling random people that I'm in a "judgement free zone" then I threw up
Randomize
