i think i've said "don't judge me" 10+ times tonight... is that a bad thing?
yes
... don't judge me
Singing into hair straightener during spice girls....sooo dangerous
you tried to do a keg stand and ended up flipping over it and onto the table
how the hell did we fit 12 drunk lesbians in your car?! I felt like we were playing lesbian tetris last night.
I feel like we're taking advantage of the fact that our R.A has cerebal palsey.
i woke up in the fire place with a lighter in my hand. if i would have died the night would have made up for it.
You try staying up all night fucking a guy with a curved dick and see how much you want to go out after that.
Neighbor who got arrested at 3am just said he'd split the $ with me if I testify as the witness in his police brutality trial. He was also holding a baby and a case of beer.
CHEMICAL ENGINEER. God my mom would be so proud of me.
I just rolled an Obama blunt and a Romney shame joint for tonight. Vote wisely.
that's the first time I've heard "shenanigans" and "apocalypse" in the same sentence
I just got St Patricks day and the day after St Patricks day off, wich I'm pretty sure is as close to a raise as I'll ever get.
There's nothing more rewarding than telling you that I fucked your dad
It was an interesting experience to have sex while there was a triathlon going on right outside my bedroom window because it sounded like everyone is cheering for you in bed.
How supportive!
i feel as though me waking up and asking her if i went to the hospital was a sign that i was not okay
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