But sometimes ur dick treats me better than u do
the girl i fucked last night woke up this morning, disoriented and looked at me, and said "oh, you're hot." and went back to sleep.
I can't get away from Pickles they're either stuck in me, in my mouth, or I'm stuck in one. fuck my whole entire life.
Climbing onto the roof in a dress and high heeled boots was probably not the best idea, especially after all that Bacardi.
Two questions: what are you doing RIGHT NOW? and do you know how to drive a golf cart?
The cops knocked on our door just to ask us if we were really having a no-pants party.
I thought it went well, but he just sent me a video of me sucking an icicle on the fire escape of his building with the caption "The ice got more than I did." Somehow I feel like I owe him a blowjob.
I can't stream porn because Xbox live is taking all the Internet. I thought having a male roommate would make life easier.
I was like wtf you can warn a girl like hey I have a huge dick and I fuck for hours
Someone google feeding your vagina Advil and Neosporin
You missed the winter stoner olympics last night....I got the gold in blunt rolling
how much do I hate his dog? was just googling to see if you can rent a hungry eagle for the weekend hate.
I never realized the effects a broken spine would have on my sex life
And if you haven't kicked a pigeon you haven't started your morning right
I have no idea what to do with myself since we graduated.
I've just been napping and sexting all day.
I want you to worship my cock.
That's not how you start a conversation.
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