my little brother got his license today.. too early to ask him to DD?
enterprise is going to pick me up, im too high for this
ATMs should seriously have built in breathalysers, I would save so much money.
I imagine the nuva ring like a bug zapper. It just kills them all.
There is too much vodka and too much dick.
You're breaking my vagina 4 times a day I reserve the right to know your middle name.
I just saw the list where the U.S. doesn't even rank in the top 10 in drinking countries. I know its Tuesday but....its for America
Apparently we both projectiled on Erin at the same time.
That's some true roommate bonding right there.
Smoked a Vape in the library status: completed
Na Im fine, just need to un-grow this vagina I've developed
Tell me not to purchase 500 ball pit balls and a kiddy pool
No
You said you couldn't look at me because you would have to take off your sunglasses but you can't because they're the "guides to your eyes".
I need to stop getting picked up at 3 am by my friends parents. This is the second time this week. I'm a grown man.
Just got tinder matched with my COMM TA. Game on.
We were 69ing, but at an angle so we could both still watch Wall-E
Randomize
