WHY DIDN'T ANYON E TELL ME SHE WAS SIXTEEN
he sat in the bathtub shirtless yelling in gibberish for 40 minutes. funniest. stoner. ever.
Looking at the victoria's secret website makes the ice cream I'm eating taste like sadness and obesity
yeah. pants. i need to put pants on. i didn't do that last night. big mistake
He's trying to get everyone in the bathtub for a team meeting about how we're gonna find his car. Which is parked outside. Think we should cut him off?
Is your answer to that text seriously a right parenthesis
I knew you would eventually ask my secret. Pedialite mix drinks. Works wonders.
more embarrassing than that time i showed up to class in my hoodie and leggings because i over slept, and then as i zipped my hoodie down i realized i didn't sleep with a bra on or a shirt
I feel like parents watching our children. You want to step in and help them but you just have to let them make their mistakes
At one point I was convinced he was a snake and was going to eat me And I just accepted it
YAS. BRING CRAB.
YALL MOTHERFUCKERS WANNA WATCH HEAVY METAL AND SMOKE WEED AND PLAY POOL AND DRINK BEER AND SMOKE WEED
I brought my porn computer to class by accident
How much porn do you watch if you need a special computer?
Tell me that I didn't just get ash in my Russian and just mix it TF in bc who cares and life has no meaning.
Just a heads up that Dad just brought home a new Porsche and the sales girl he bought it from.
Umm okay. What are they doing?
They’re in the hot tub
Can I get divorced when I grow up?
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