you know you made it when your beer pong table is made from imported italian hardwood
I should just tell him this. He doesn't need to be all nice and ask me on dates and to do gay stuff like hangout during the day. I'll still sleep with him regardless.
He said "ride me pocahontas" while I was on top of him last night
I fell asleep with my vibrator still in me. I am the Queen of Sad Masturbation.
He waited exactly 18 minutes to booty call me after his break up.
Going to rent a magician for when I eat shrooms. How has no one thought of this?
Guess which frat house I just walked out of! And on a related note... guess who's uncircumsized
Just because I don't want to be her booty call doesn't mean I wanna stop getting tit pics. I'm a sucker for double D's
Def over. He sent me a nude selfie but cropped it right above his junk. Total Silence of the Fucking lambs looking.
I can check masterbating in China off the bucket list.
Don't worry I sent a creepy stalker message to a guy I slept with 6 years ago, Sunday Funday rock bottom
At the light, his mom pulled up next to us while I was giving him road head. He forgot to tell me she was meeting us at the movie. So long story short, I convinced her I drove myself, pick me up in 20.
this vacation is helping with my sexual bucket list so much. threesome, deaf guy, and outdoor sex all accomplished.
is it sad that the highlight of my saturday night was waiting till 3 in the morning to hear about your saturday night?
I'm seriously considering starting a savings account so I'll have bail money this summer.
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