I hope im prettier
yea, just so you know this whole self-loathing thing is getting pretty fucking annoying
hahaha Yeah oh well, she wrote on my facebook wall, That's almost like a digital hand job
i just assumed he broke up with her because she wasn't a freshman anymore
I'm so hungover, I actually considered rolling down the stairs to avoid walking.
New swimming pool is best sex toy ever. We are pioneering the doggie-style paddle.
Every time I remember you're bi, the world gets a little brighter.
dude you cant keep breaking into my house just to raid my fridge.. especially at 3AM.
See this is what happens when we don't have sex everyday
I'm stranded in the Hampton area. Looks like I'm going to have to take one for the team and pass out by this applebees.
I have been drinking since 2. And I'm now chasing the cat around the house with a light saber. Anna's helping.
I went on my dinner date pretending that my lunch date didn't jizz in my hair.
ur mom makes the best bacon
WHAT ARE YOU DOING IN MY HOUSE
An old white couple caught us smoking the foot long. THE LOOK ON THEIR FACES.
I mean, you've seen me eat pizza, sober, out of a garbage can, and yet I refuse to go eat at that place. Just sayin....
She was doing drunken zumba and screaming "FUCK YOU I HAVE MY OWN STYLE!" at the TV
Randomize
