ok, his religious views on facebook are madonna lyrics. we no longer have to wonder about his sexuality.
Nope it's a specific set of cards not like a normal ace, queen king thing....kinda like UNO, but instead of yelling UNO you get shitfaced
I feel like my life has just been one 21 year long episode of "i shouldn't be alive"
and then the other night his penis tricked us both into sex
My glasses smell like tequila. I just put them on and almost threw up.
Riding on an electric horse at the grocery store... dunno how that conversation went but I hope you picked up a 12 pack.
I just wish I could congratulate your tits on how much I love seeing them
he told me he was a Boston Bruins fan so I took his hat into the bathroom and peed in it...I've never been a prouder Ranger fan
I told him he was probably the first guy to get fucked while wearing Star Wars pyjamas.
Today is going to be the longest game of "was that a fart, or do I need to go wipe?" I have ever played. Maybe the most challenging too.
Only at Harvard can you walk in on a bunch of stoners and expect everyone to immediately stand up, shake your hand and introduce themselves like we're at a fucking job fair
Last night I flashed a car full of people my tits for a bag of pretzels so yeah I'd say I was at least tipsy.
It's a little weird that I'm blowing my wingman.
i liked you for your lack of ambition and abundance of weed
You don't know the capacity of my vagina
Randomize
