I changed my mind about Tim Gunn. I like him now. Mostly because he said someone's dress looks like a gay t-rex. Or something.
This girls' body was nothing short of spectacular...her face, was like the '09 Detroit Lions
This could be one of the worst things i've done... The background of her phone is her and her boyfriend.
I'm literally partying with O.J. Simpson's son right now. I don't know what to make of this.
once you started introducing yourself as "running-bear" i knew you were beyond fucked up
On the one year anniversary of me loosing my virginity... thousands of people will be taking their pants of on subways all around the world
It's like a tribute to you being a slut
HOW DO YOU GET TO BE A GROWN-UP AND NOT KNOW WHAT A DECADE IS!?
Opened my purse to realize I have someone else's birth certificate. What happens to me in college?
In my dream, you became a famous tap-dancer. Congratulations.
Good. Sleepy. In the middle of a pregnancy scare. The usual.
It will be interesting
Isn't that your life's motto?
hooked up with someone last night while wearing walrus pajama pants. clearly I'm accomplishing big things in life
I'm hungry and horny. DEADLY COMBINATION.
her idea of a romantic time is a bottle of jager, some Guacamole and chips.
can't go wrong with guac.
You just sent a mass text asking if anyone ever drank the blood of a goat in the glorious name of Satan...after that we confiscated any writing utensil
Randomize
