My family just had an in depth argument about the meaning of chodes
we're getting ready to take strippers to breakfast. I love my life.
my dad just told me that a lesbian kissed my mom at a bar last year
He is either going to be in my pants or get a restraining order against me.
morning outfit: hottub soaked skirt. no underwear. someone's bandanna worn as a shirt. took me an hour to walk home. this isn't fun anymore.
Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
so my doctor just swabbed my throat, and he looked up in suprise when i had no gag reflex. yea, he just judged me.
You know, last years football game was epic, but seeing the same girl that gave you a bj in the parking lot, in the same parking spot...that's fate.
Two dudes. Loud music. Dancing shirtless possibly naked. Why would I ever need cable?!
The shit I just took was four, very distinct colors. Jager night was a success
I just realized why I have little cuts all over my fingers. There was a broken pint glass in my purse last night.
Just got offered bathroom sex. I've never been more flattered.
And they're not making a turkey. My cousin was "hoping to shoot a bird this week"
High me is so sweet. She left not-high me a fortune from a fortune cookie and 6 packets of soy sauce in my tampon drawer.
The squirrels were at the front door. Dude I swear..
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