I mean, she is a dancer for the Suns. If I didnt fuck her that would just be bad team spirit.
The last thing I remember is yelling "ill handle this" while wearing a lion suit and holding a jug of vodka when the RAs came
Correct me if I'm wrong, but I did not stop moving last night. If tequila gives me that extra push to have an active lifestyle, so be it.
This weekend is gunna be a fucking shitshow. I don't even wanna know how many dicks will end up inside of me
Puked up what appears to be battery acid next to the treadmill. Everyone noticed.
His dad asked what he was doing so he texted his FATHER a picture of me wearing his shirt in his bed.
There is no such thing as a great breathalizer story. That isn't a thing that exists.
hey now, it was 6 bucks for 5 shots. you would have lost your panties too.
Impressive. I've never gotten straight denied and then chased the guy naked out of my own apt. I'll remember that next time.
I should probably stop recommending my dentist to the different guys I'm seeing. That could be awkward in the future.
I think it was a low point but honestly at this point I've had so many that my life is like a valley
I look at it as community service. He was going through a rough time and I gave him an ego boost. That's how we're going to remember it. I was doing a good deed lol
I don't know what happened last night. But I just woke up in the high school boiler room
I think I was judged by a squirrel this morning during the walk...
You're a problem for me, dick game too good. In the future when I'm with someone I actually wanna to date, now I'm gonna compare.
Randomize
