Oh my god. I just envisioned myself eating panda meat. I need to get out of this class.
Astroglide: It's like Bengay for your ass.
He booked his flight from Dallas already, no ticket to the game, said hes gonna bang some girl at tailgait to get a ticket, I had to explain that it will be sub 20 degrees F during tailgate, he decided to come in july instead, Texans are dumb.
I think you're asking the wrong person. You don't understand. Like I would fuck the act of fucking itself if I could.
That was the most comfortable bag of doritos I have ever slept on!
The trainer from the tech college told me that I would pass the first aid course so long as I turned up sober. Challenge accepted
Haha at least the one I have like that you can't tell we are completely drunk and you're about to kick a glass out of my hand in a fit of joy over pizza.
Every time I someone I meet again from that wedding it turns into the "Oh your the guy who puked in the hallway and passed out in front of the elevator."
Note to self: don't practice nerdy white girl dance choreography in the company bathrooms no matter how nice the huge mirrors and lighting are.
I feel like we should apologize to the light saber. We were REALLY inappropriate with it last night.
I work nights. I sleep in. I take online classes. And fuck bad bitches. I'd say those are some perks to grad school.
The only thing that got rode last night was the shit face train. I brought him home to see wht all the hype was about and he just started crying and puking in my bathroom.
I want to be a supportive friend to her, but I also want to sleep with her ex now that he's single.
What is ur current declared sexuality for my bingo board
The highlight of my week is I found some hetero porn I didn't completely hate. Branching out.
Randomize
