I'm upset that MJ died and all but waking up to his face on my HDTV in the middle of the night while half-asleep is pretty much the scariest fucking thing ever.
everyone made a circle around them and startd chanting fight fight. they wernt fighting, they were dry humping
I'm on his itunes. He has a sex playlist. It's actually not so much a playlist as 12 Kylie Minogue songs with a big gay Whitney finish.
We have to give a final comment in english, i think i might say "i learned it's a bad idea to make out with people in your classes who have girlfriends."
he picked an earring up off the bar floor and tried to give it to girls as a present.
you two really need to work out your issues. my vagina can't handle another week of your pent up frustrations.
They should make a traveling bouncer service to remove unwanted people from your house without getting the cops involved. That sums up my Friday.
I'll always remember you bringing me that pregnancy test in the middle of an ice storm. Best friend ever.
HE GAVE ME ONE OF HIS BEERS.
YOU'RE THE CHOSEN ONE.
Oh god now he thinks I'm into him because I've been staring at him trying to figure out what animal he looked like
i don't know why he's complaining, i'm the one with four hickeys on my ass.
I THINK it was the lead singer. Whoever he was, I have his number and his dick was pierced.
It was totally the lead singer.
ETSY JUST SENT ME AN EMAIL WITH THE SUBJECT "SUMER ROMANCE" I'M BEYOND FUCKING DONE
WHAT KIND OF DEALER ONLY WORKS FRI-SUN???
Ours, apparently.
I was just in the bathroom and some guy yelled all hail the king... i cant go anywhere without getting recognized anymore.
Randomize