you can't get genital warts from dogs can you?
seeing an 80 year old woman puke in the bushes changes everything...
that's spring break in florida for ya
my mom said i couldn't bring cigarettes cause it was a family trip, which was really irresponsible of her because now i have to walk around the beach drunk trying to find someone with cigarettes.
He made fire alarm noises before throwing up all over the street.
Well look at it this way, if he should happen to get into a terrible accident within the next 2 days, its okay.. i have his dental records on my ass cheek.
Well the pizza delivery man was either startled or incredibly intrigued to see me skateboarding in the living room by myself at 1 in the morning in ripped pantyhose
Just made macaroni burritos. Fukkin awesome. We'll have to try this when I'm sober.,!
I've heard awesome things about their margaritas. I also may buy a mustache from party city. Would you do me with a mustache on??! Hahahaha. But, really.
Yep. It's going to be us, strippers, and drag queens.
A glittery, gay, heavily makeuped, scantily dressed clusterfuck.
I want to tell everyone I've ever met about how he him picking me up and fucking me against the wall was the highlight of my life. Worst lesbian ever.
i think ive reached a prime reproductive point in my life or somethin- i see gingers and all i want to do is have their babies. like my body knows that i have a to carry on a legacy
you don't even have a vagina so you don't get to tell me what to put in mine
I stepped in puke last night then washed it off my shoe with beer. Is there a grace period to respect before wearing them to class?
I heard you ran into my sister lastnight. Do you remember making out with her and slapping my uncle?
This is my life. Currently ordering a gift for my straight married girlfriend's husband from my lesbian married girlfriend.
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