Have you learned any life lessons?
I like big butts and I cannot lie.
My milkshake brings 85 to 90 percent of the boys to the yard
he was on top of me and all of a sudden stopped and starting picking his nose...i asked him if he was okay, he sort of looked confused, and he told me he had a booger that hurt. guess its a good thing i wasnt planning on dating this guy
Vodka + horseback riding = vomit in the saddle bags
mimosa in my stainless steel water bottle. going green is not that bad.
All his texts have the signature of a date with a smile. I asked him what it means. IT'S THE DAY HE QUIT DOING DRUGS
He went all Bachlorette on me.. "I just want to guard and protect your heart" bullshit
I think my vagina is going to steal my keys and drive over there.
Hopefully she would park on my face.
Your never gonna wash that desperation outta that sweatshirt you know.
I'm the saddest girl in a tutu right now.
I'm doing homework tonight but if you end up going out drinking I would like one courtesy peer pressure text.
"fuck it, let's do moonshine" shouldn't be in ANYONE'S vocabulary.
I'm really interested in the size of his penis so report back on that one
Good morning 7am walk of shame. It's been awhile.
i am also 80% sure that my shirt glows in the dark.
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