So I went out tonight...met a guy who slightly resembled my dad,huge creeper, he asked me to "hang out" so I gave him my moms number since he was more her type:)
We did face masks and fucked...he really isn't gay, what they say about europeans is just true
Does he know anything about your personal life besides what you look like without clothes on?
morning after pill = breakfast in bed
Its time to go balls to the wall to get any good D during these last few weeks of college.
yes he does come on. what guy wouldnt want his penis named after a dragon
You don't understand she was in the fountain pretending she was diving for treasure. I couldn't possibly ruin her dreams.
God I need to stop before there's a picture of my dick on my mom's phone.
Some girl is sitting topless in the kitchen and having a Skype video chat with some guy. I already like it here.
He just unloaded a dump truck full of red flags on my head.
It was a simpler time. With fewer STDs.
You know that gay bartender? Not as gay as we thought.....
So I'm trying to figure out how to talk my boss into allowing pajama day once a week. Any ideas?
I'm bleeding and have questions
i got drunk and started dancing with the plant because you were out of town
Randomize
