Down for casual relationships, more fun than catholic missionary, bring condoms and don't get attached.
No offense but you kinda look like a Jack Johnson fan in that pic
plan parent hood is for high school, im at the abortion clinic, so college.
we'll go far in life on tits alone.
I'm currently blowing up the downstairs bathroom at work. I wish I could foursquare this.
Sorry for feeding you peanuts last night while you were sleeping, you looked hungry.
That's why I don't chug things. Because when I was a freshman in college tequila came out my nose.
Dude you're alone at a bar with a woman, and you're talking about my junk?
I'm really stoned in my underwear. I probably won't make it to the bar.
I'm getting better, this year I only showed up drunk to 1 final.
Immediately after sex he layed on the floor and acted like my yellow bra was pac man
so hungover i had to get off the train to puke, rallied and went to work. not sure if that's an adulting win or fail
I'm pretty sure I just won at life. I touched the bushy tail of a squirrel while he had his mouth full and was digging in a plant on campus. That is all.
Maybe i don’t have a tell. Maybe wine is my poker face.
I just found your shirt hanging in a tree 4 blocks from the party...in the opposite direction of your house. where are you going?
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