Her sex list was a LOT longer than mine. She tried to justify it by saying '4 of those don't count because they were in the gang bang'.
He honestly told me my belt was "supercute" when we started hooking up. I would be the girl to find the only straight man in the world that uses the word "supercute".
I'm still in shock that he came by my house for five minutes dropped off a Teddy bear and went to the strip club on valentines day
You take your time. Wallowing in last nights filth is the best way to get over a hangover
fat people need to stop using the handicapped bathroom stall so I can have sex in it. it's common logic
Just talked a homeless guy out of suicide. Was rewarded with a garbage bag full of mountain dew bottles and zannies. Im such a good person
At 2pm we are having a MANDITORY house meeting about last night. ALL must be in attendance!
I'd like to review the planning and execution of the party to determine how we hosted a naked party, to determine how we can have more.
He wants to take me instead of his girlfriend to the happiest place on earth... By that He meant Vegas. My morals are just loose enough to think this is a good idea
I guess I'll just chalk it up as a learning experience and a lot of great sex.
so I guess I made a note in my phone last night to remind myself not to do shrooms on the cruise ship
Is using cherry lube as jam shameful or hilarious
Hi. Tara tells me your sandwiches and stamina are substantial
It's such a sad loss when a hot guy finds Jesus and grows a neckbeard
You texted him 17 times. Asking for him back and sending random pictures of Jimmy Buffett. He didn't answer.
Knew i was going to puke. So i grabed a bowl out of the kitcken in the dark before bed...Ended up puking into a spaghetti strainer...
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