Oh just a soda. I'm "driving"
Does having sex in the men's bathroom on the boardwalk count as having sex on the beach?
Just seeing my phone say "picture message from: Senor Floppy Cock", i knew it was going to make me smile.
Dont even try and act like it wasn't you who made the sex tape of my dogs.
One of two things would happen: He'd love it, or you'd get a restraining order.
DID YOU REALLY JUST GIVE ME A FIRST BASE SIGN
So hungover. Walked into room and poached their catering before realized in wrong place. Scowled and ate it anyway
Send me another check for the tickets. I scratched out "anal wax" and now the bank won't take it.
Just left a strip club where they let me on stage to teach them tricks. Time of my life!
These past few weeks have been a lesson on why you don't put your penis inside girls who live in your building.
Ever since we've gotten back together, it's like the ghosts of booty call's past have been hitting me up. Lol.
Take off your clothes and see if he wants to have sex, that's a good way to find out
And speaking of good acting I may have a sex tape now
We spent our last night together taking turns vomiting in the bathroom. I'd say it was a romantic trip.
I was peer pressured into smoking weed by a bunch of LGBTQ teenagers
Randomize
