I think jizz is working it's way to becoming my number 1 food source.
that's the last time we turn jepordy into a drinking game.
my mom used to put diet coke in my bottle. i can pretty much handle anything.
I have a music final in an hour so I put all the classical songs we need to know in a shower power hour playlist, beer included.
I've thrown up twice at work. Just casually, in the mop sink. Then continued to make someone a milkshake. Want some ice cream?
My catholic guilt is strong, but the alcohol is stronger.
SOS. HE HAS PASSED OUT AND IS LYING ON TOP OF ME. HE IS STILL INSIDE. HELP
I can't turn my head to the left, I'm pissing out of my ass, and my finger went through the toilet paper today... I need you.
We have 24 days left before I leave for college and 21 condoms left in the stockpile. Are you up for the challenge?
At least I will not still be rolling when I pick up this animal. Thats a good development in five years
Omg. The news was on TV while I was giving him a bj...when the weatherman said its a beautiful start to December, he groaned and said it sure is.
Apparently "I licked it so now it's mine" doesn't apply to people
I was drunk and really grossed out when you poured cheese on me and, I guess I just freaked out.
The first thing you did was give us a tour of the house and showed us who was "on-limits" and "off-limits"
Still drunk. lying on the floor just rubbing my cats nipples
Randomize
