HOnestly. That's my one goal for this whole trip. I don't give a shit about souvenirs or sand. I want penis.
She should get an extra 30 days for that Georgia Rule movie......terrible.
well as my mentor always said, "Don't antagonize the man whose penis gives you multiple orgasms."
something isn't right. i offered to be his sex slave and he declined..
I just masturbated to the audio from my psych lecture . . . this screwing my prof fantasy is getting serious.
We told you to stay put for 2 minutes. We come back out and your being handcuffed yelling "DO YOU FEEL LIKE A GOOD FUCKING PERSON ARRESTING ME ON MY BIRTHDAY?!"
by the way- Brandy out of a doggy bowl was AMAZING
The good news is that I can 100% reassure you that you did not get knocked up by some creepy Italian dude named Sal Manella last night.
The bad news is that you will never know the name of the guy who may have gotten you pregnant last night because he clearly gave you a fake name, sweetie.
It's a lost cause. Soon she's gonna get naked, just let nature run its course
I just sneezed weed. Kinda wanna try to smoke it.
You had your shirt off checking IDs at the door and you don't even work there
Dude just the look on his face when she sat down next to him, threw one leg over his, and just said "so..." was fucking amazing
He was on top and as he finished he yelled "I love gold" , so yeah I'm seeing him later tonight
Was banging my ex last night when his roommate walked in... We kept going. #goaheadandwatch
Leave it to me to pull up my boyfriend’s grandfather’s obituary just to find out the name of his sister.
Randomize
