I just am on my way home.. i had 3 and one startd crying and puking.. so they went home. one bitch fuckin ruined it for evryone.. u playin cards?
people and things i regret. that's what i want to do tonight.
clay aiken is like melissa ehteridge without the guitar.
He had personality for days, but cock for only minutes
I just convinced a girl to drink my spit cup cuz I said it was dark beer and would get her drunk faster. I dare you to try something better.
If there was an emoticon for a sad penis, i would send it to you
I had 4 margarita's and 2 mixed drinks and i blew zero's. Its a cinco de mayo miracle.
HOnestly. That's my one goal for this whole trip. I don't give a shit about souvenirs or sand. I want penis.
I mean I gotta puke to be skinny, wax to be hairless, and drink to be fun. Life isn't easy.
I bruised my spine.. Jungle gyms were clearly not meant for sex.
Because of him my new motto is "Keep calm and fuck a guy with a beard". Yes, I am serious.
He said it. He actually said "yes it's in".
How does a law student 15 days away from graduation prepare for a pass fail final? Drinking beer, eating thick cut bacon, and watching game of thrones, that's how
I had sex with a boy who lives in a closet, that's like having sex with Harry Potter, right?
I never thought I would encounter a situation that was "Too Gay" for me...and yet there I was.
Randomize