had another sex dream about alec baldwin...
if you don't let us come over today i'm not taking the second plan b pill. your call.
I just saw the pics of me from the costume party as Party Boy. I've effectively cock-blocked myself forever.
i go for whatevers easier....i'm bisexual strictly due to the convenience factor
Totalylr drunk. Coveredc in cryola marker. Loving it. Straight men everywhere. Don't be surprises when I'm pregbat romorrowwwww
When are you not under some influence?
Since last Tuesday...yesterday.
Then again, I'm single and napping with a stuffed yoda doll...so I'm not the world's authority on shit.
Any time you can't remember a night, and you wake up in a sorority house, it's fucking worth it.
Wake up we need to beat the walk of shame rush hour
My mouth taste like pussy and my dad noticed. Hahahaha
I have the rest of my life to settle down this is totally time for friends and pizza
To this day, I regret not having sex in the bathroom
Side note: I just realized that I can make my hand warmers double as a heated push up bra.
YOU LICKED MY MAKEUP OFF.
It got to the point where I was so drunk, playing rock paper scissors as a drinking game seemed like a good idea.
Randomize
