Awesome. Ask her out.
Nope. She's got a detail of ed hardy security around her.
Its not like he dircectly choose a cheeseburger over sex, it was more like I said seductively "I really appreciate this and I'm going to make it up to you anyway I can" and he replied "i want a bacon cheeseburger"
i guess he just knew i was going to sleep with him either way
my mom just told me how she used to love having sex while stoned. wtf.
We all have a cross to bear. Yours just happens to be attracting gay men.
I'm still trying to decide if it's a complement when he said "I'd like to subscribe to your daddy issues".
took 4 advil with a shot of vodka, figure i'd try to save myself now
I standby a snuggie being perfectly acceptable attire for drunkenly walking your dog at 5am. Our new neighbors did not seem to agree.
I think I won over his best friend. He was staring at my boobs all night.
I had to wash my hair with conditioner because my sister got hammered and gave the dog a 3am sprinkler bath with my shampoo.
I'm going to take a nap so I don't feel like a stripper sneezed in my mouth tomorrow morning at work.
I finished masturbating now I'm eating french toast crunch. What is life, and what are friends.
honestly my period and I are just as surprised to see each other every month
If he's gonna send me dick pics; he should at least zoom in to make it look bigger.
Pregnancy has ruined porn for me. I can't watch a hot chick get it on without being jealous of her perfectly waxed shit. I can't even see my shit.
Lesbians just stole my cat :(
Randomize