So bad night, ended up beating off to porn and eating Keebler elf cookies.... at the same time :-(
We made out for three hours. Then she said she didn't sleep with redheads and left the party. So yes, I'm still drinking.
I'm naked in the window of the hotel and I feel like I'm walking in slow motion like a robot
I'll always be here to give you immoral support.
Our logic class started an hour ago, I walked out and found my sister drunk, sitting down, eating m&ms, afraid to walk in... I want her life
Driving a mountain pass in the middle of a blizzard with the worst vodka gummybear hangover ever is gods way of telling me to keep the black-outing within a 15 mile radius to my house.
He just tried to eat my hair and he keeps talking about pissing on everything, come home soon I beg of you
Do you have any pictures of me mounting animals that aren't on Facebook?
right now I need to figure out a smart way to get an accurate picture of his dick so I know what in dealing with, right now in flying blind.
Using my graduation announcement box as a table to roll a blunt on. I've official stopped giving a shit about senior year
Oh no. Did you guys fuck on my pull out couch?
I got so high that I ate a protein bar while in the shower. I then proceeded to leave half the protein bar and the wrapper on the ledge in my shower. Haha oh well.
My only contacts are booty calls or the club hockey team.
I just heard a crying baby from out my apartment window and yelled SAME
We're both fucking guys named Frank. Our friendship was meant to be.
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