R you on birth control?
No, why?
...no reason
I'm not working tomorrow. need to take advantage of the last opportunity for weeks of morning sex.
i keep walking around campus wondering if anyone is as stoned as i am
last day of my family cruise we all got trashed and had an award ceremony. I got the award for hooking up with a cougar. my grandma hugged me and said im living up to the legacy. this is why my familys better than yours
2nd night home for break and we had to call the fire department to keep the house from burning down. At this rate I'll be lucky to see you next semester.
Remember middle school health class where we used to say that when we lost our vcards we would be on the pill, using a condom, and have had our partners tested first? We were so optimistic.
Would you get mad if I held a "how many dick pics can you get in one night" competition with my friend?
Rehydrating your liver back to life is never a good idea.
It's not even close to Halloween but there is a girl in a nurses outfit. Twerk or twat.
By the power invested in me i promise you hot wedding sex at my wedding.
As a friend tho, you have the biggest dick I've ever seen
I'm a stupid stupid woman who is totally going to rock this holiday season dick drunk on that Ginger
please don't forget about the bread in the toilet i am absolutely not dealing with that
My manager caught me going taking a nap in an empty room. Apparently she sleeps there too.
If he isn’t into CosPlay he will be after tonight. That naughty nurse outfit heals broken hearts
Randomize
