nut hugger
I wish your couch was made out of beer. I would drink like half of it.
btw, your gf is going to want to talk to you today...and consequently you're probably not going to want to talk to me...just a heads up
Liz and I are now offficially highest. OH, and your girlfriend may be a vampire. Heads up. SPARKLESSSSS
Put my glitter back.
you might get a letter about the baby you put in me. i was mad when i sent it.
i can't believe he got me to come over to him by waving a natty light at me.
The night ended with a lot of tears and everyone singing along to Willenium
i was trying to wake him up so i just kept touching his dick
Girl next to me just ralphed in a bag. Congrats class of 2010
i can barely draw a stick figure let alone shave a heart into my pubes
Tell them you aren't trying to make money, you are just the mr rogers of weed,its such a good feeling a very good feeling the feeling you know that were friends
I was going through my mom's stuff to find her xanax, and I found her vibrators instead. Plural. That is like the opposite of what I wanted.
DONT YOU DARE DIE YET THERE IS SO MUCH SEX TO BE HAD
Masturbating to death wouldn't be a terrible way to go. If you die tonight, I'll know how it went down. Promise not to tell your family.
I love you too, but sadly you're not as good at getting me out of bed as cocaine.
Randomize
