super hot butfun
Oops. What a difference a comma and a space make.
i'm really high, and this is sooooooooooo important. how many frosties does it take to fill a bathtub?
No, I'm not okay. Girls are wearing BUMPITS here.
Just found my mom passed out in my bed holding a bag of wine. Not sure if I'm ashamed or proud.
I found her under my bed eating airplane pretzels.
got so drunk i was kicked out of my own birthday party and tried taking a bottle of vodka with me
I called him daddy. To his face. Somewhat sober. What more could I do?
You found me in the back room alone eating someone else's whole birthday cake with my hands then asked me if you could join.
Come on down you're the next contestant on "lets go drinking!"
He told me that if he broke my bed my bed durring sex he would take me to ikea, but only on Monday because it's all you can eat meatballs. I think I'm in love.
I love him about as much as I'd love fucking myself with a cactus.
As he put it in he shouted "geronimo!"
Wow... So was the sex good?
Yeah but it doesn't matter. My vagina is not a pool.
I love waking up to reeses ice cream. But I DONT love waking up to it all over my cat. I blame you.
I just spent 30 minutes plucking my 2 month grown out pubes with tweezers so I’m hope your night is going better than mine
Well, I like big penises but it's not like he walks around with it out or anything so yes I think he has beautiful eyes
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