The Redheads category on Pornhub is my number 2 site behind facebook on google chrome. I think I have a problem
May have just accidentally purchased an iphone on Kate's credit card. This has potential to be bad.
I think I'm pregnant with his hipster baby. It keeps kicking my stomach to the beat of mgmt songs.
New beer pong partner names "Bus Boys" ... We clear tables
There's a walmart bag of my vomit outside my front door. I just really need someone to appreciate that with me.
so, my congressman just called me to say he has office hours this week if i'm still interested in talking to him. i pray to god this is not related to Friday.
She asked how far humans have gone into a volcano because they did in spy kids. She was serious.
All I remember about walking back home was that I maced my shadow.
How much would it be to rent out Gus Johnson so he can announce our flip cup games?
he drunk texted me to give me his number with the message "i gotchu pretty eyeso" i can't tell if he's complimenting me or himself.
I had this image of some guy in a taco truck down by the IMA accosting you for a peep show.
Everyone at work loved my story about sobering up in a river with no bra on.
Cleaning my pipe and using the left over resin solution to make THC laced rolling papers and a jar of hash oil/honey for my tea
WE USE THE WHOLE BUFFALO
he only noticed i dyed my hair purple like halfway through sex and he looked really shocked and he just said "You look like Barney." as he came.
You don't make any sense
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