I see an opportunity for you to use your nakedness to cure my boredom.
I just had a 2 1/2 hr conversation about the pros and cons of taping your ballsack to your taint, which then led into the unveilling of lady gaga being a hermaphrodite.
I want to dip my vagina in sugar. Not only will it be sweet, but it will have a nice sparkle.
For a day that started with shitting my pants, things turned out fairly well.
you made wolf sounds and yelled "team me" the entire movie
shes in my pool wearing only floaties on her arms ill have to raincheck watching march madness with you guys sorry
just credit carded her and her mom at the same time... that drunk. get on my level
Excuse me but the alley way I wanted to fuck in happens to be a very nice clean area.
Doing lines off a plate that says, "things go better with coke."
He went 'unicorn hunting' and lost a fight with a fence. That's how he ended up in the ER.
I can't. I think his penis is about to take out a restraining order against me.
I couldn't sleep so I took 4 shots of vodka and promptly threw up in the sink. Happy Thursday
There are panties and mini bottles of Fireball in my purse. Except for the broken toe incident, I'd say last night was probably a success.
Fortunatly we found him, he was on my roof. Unfortunatly, we can't say the same for his pants. Still looking. BRB.
He's smoked my weed, stolen my cigarettes, and used my campus cash, but I try to initiate sex and NOWWW he's all "As your RA, that's a line I can't cross"
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