What did I say to him last night?
Something along the lines of "your not here, I'm going to fuck sam. call me later babe, this won't take long, love you"
all in all not a bad night
Who has a tranny cab driver? I have a tranny cab driver.
david just texted me. reply with photo of genitalia? y/n
Its so akward after he cums on my face. like usually the porn just ends
i just opened a seperate checking account to keep track of how much i make and spend on our keggers
There are 144 bottles of wine in my mother's pantry. She just shrugged her shoulders and said it was for the wine pong tournament on Christmas Day.
I just hope when I turn 21, it doesn't tank my entire semester.
eating jello out of the cup. with my face. while on the toilet. i am at my lowest.
Did we do anything stupid last night besides hook up with our ex girlfriends?
I tried to take home a cat on broadway last night. I named him Pinocchio and put my purse down on the sidewalk and tried to put it inside it
I hung my underwear from the tree in his front yard. Consider my territory marked.
Adderall went through the wash. Took it anyway. Wish me luck.
I can't really feel a difference, so essentially I paid 60 bucks to bedazzle my vag.
We were having sex and he started doing some weird swivel move. I was like wtf and he said sorry just trying to pop my knee.
Somehow, walking in on your drunk mom in a diaper was the least traumatic thing I saw last night
Randomize
