I have my period so I felt bad and blew him with cash cab in the background. I wanted to yell out the answers but my mouth was full.
I feel like I'm one of those people who someone looks at and thinks "how did she get into this college"
Is it weird that I found myself thinking of that blue chick from Avatar while she gave me head after the movie?
mom asked me why i'm never sober at family events, i told her i learned it from her.
I can't leave. She doesn't trust me and my penis being out in the world without supervision.
Does she usually listen to trance and cut up broccoli when she's high?
He was using OnStar to get directions to the bar. I'm pretty sure he'd have gotten her number too if I hadn't disconnected the call.
Mom just posted ur drunk pix from Cancun in the newly made "My not-so-fantastic son" album. Thought you should know.
All i remember is Liz dragging me home yelling at me, crying, and barfing
In the sauna. Drunk. When I close my eyes I think I'm a dog. Is that wrong?
There is a glee sing along. It's on random and they know them all. Like, the specific glee timings and pauses. I need to leave. I need to escape
I'm gonna celebrate Valentines day by watching Bob Ross videos and tripping balls.
I only know one person in my class and that's my dealer.
NO FUCKING RANDOMS IN AN ALLEY
the bouncer just handed me a Starbucks bag of pound cake
Randomize