I'm really into asian looking animals
I told him that all frat guys do it... it was that easy to get him to go down on me.
running late. just ran over a dude on a bike
He was sweet. He even warned me that his dick curved, and I quote, "more than a banana."
Its like fucking yourself in the head with a weed strapon
I can hear her blowing you man. All I hear is her saying 'yeah' over and over again.
Hey I'm not sure why your jacket's covered in maple syrup but I just realized you didn't leave the house earlier wearing a jacket...
Well when you get back to your computer, there's a nice explanation of pansexuality on your Skype.
We are there now. They have a giant cock and balls with an eagles face and wings.
to improve your porn experience, just imagine a slow speaking older English man narrating it all like a Nature documentary
Why do I have a bunch of cash....and your bra.
I'm going to make a stack of pancakes and fuck it. Right now.
He makes furniture for a living and is basically a hot, younger Ron Swanson
I was just at the gas station and happened to look left and see a girl blowing some guy. How was your night?
No I’m scared man. She sharted. In my car. Wearing a dress. And I still like her.
Wow
Randomize
