Christians are straight up FREAKS
Just bummed a recreational vicodin off my friend's 40 year old boyfriend & am hoovering a breakfast sammy from costco. And I don't have a boyfriend because why?
he rolled over and started playing skeeball on his iphone after we had the best sex yet considering he only lasted 10 seconds last time.. im getting standards.. tomorrow. for now im just going to enjoy the fact i counted over 20 this time.
I think my hot accountant is wearing banana republic. I miss the days when that ='ed gay. Signals are so confusing now.
whatever. i fb stalked him and his pic comments are witty. so i'm going for it.
You always know it is going to end badly when a guy asks if he met you at a "coed naked lawn bowling party"
We should have cut you off when you asked the can driver if you could ride in the trunk.
Well there's nothing more unattractive them a naked, soft man crying
Oh good your over him
I imagine I kinda look like a banana with one boob out.
It wasn't a basement apartment, it's his parents basement. And he wanted to show me his pet tarantula collection. I NOPED THE FUCK OUT!
I wish the guy I was sleeping with wasn't on house arrest.
Come share oat with me in your robe
just creeped your profile pictures and you should feel satisfied in knowing that you had great eyebrows even before people started drawing them on
It was like a baby arm holding another baby arm holding an apple grove. Fuckin huge!
Which one have i been cheating ON and which one have i been cheating WITH if i met them the same night & have been dividing time equally?
Randomize
